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  The Dangers of Being a People-Pleaser

By Len Canter
HealthDay Reporter

MONDAY, June 3, 2019 (HealthDay News) -- Being thoughtful and caring are great qualities to have, but if you go out of your way to get people to like you, you could be a people-pleaser, with unfortunate consequences for your own well-being.

If you're always saying yes to others, you're likely giving up time spent on things that really matter to you. If you're always acting in a way that makes others happy, but not doing the same for yourself, you may not be living according to your own values.

Bending over backwards to please others can quickly escalate into unhealthy behavior. If your conversations with others are based on what you think they want to hear, you may start telling little white lies, a habit that becomes easier and easier, according to a study in the journal Nature Neuroscience. Worse still, what starts out as telling little fibs can develop into fabricating big lies.

When you get caught up trying to please someone else, you get caught up in guessing how they want you to be. You might start to change your natural behavior to get them to like you. Experts say that's actually an example of your manipulating the other person, even though you might not even be aware of what you're doing. People-pleasing can erode your sense of integrity -- and you can start feeling bad about yourself.

Experts say that being yourself and risking people not liking you is better than experiencing the stress and tension that results from bending over backwards to please others.

More information

The Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley has more on the dangers of being a people-pleaser and how to recognize the signs.

Copyright © 2019 HealthDay. All rights reserved. URL:http://consumer.healthday.com/Article.asp?AID=745992

Resources from HONselect: HONselect is the HON's medical search engine. It retrieves scientific articles, images, conferences and web sites on the selected subject.
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The list of medical terms above are retrieved automatically from the article.

Disclaimer: The text presented on this page is not a substitute for professional medical advice. It is for your information only and may not represent your true individual medical situation. Do not hesitate to consult your healthcare provider if you have any questions or concerns. Do not use this information to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease without consulting a qualified healthcare professional.
Be advised that HealthDay articles are derived from various sources and may not reflect your own country regulations. The Health On the Net Foundation does not endorse opinions, products, or services that may appear in HealthDay articles.


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